Tag Archives: colored pencil

MoonDance

29 Mar


A little project of mine since forever.
In the cycle of the moon, it is the First Quarter Moon.
half light half dark
Balanced
Poised…
a choice point.
Tomorrow, I will walk out into my world under a Gibbous Moon, ideally, with a sense of wonder, delight, desire and adventure.
The word commitment is often paired with the1st Quarter Moon and for me it’s becoming a conscious commitment to the practice of ‘getting my heart in the right place’ – opening up and out to the World.

I’m making a deal with myself today, that I will try to pull back on my knee-jerk fears when they come up, and exchange fear for blessing- seeing what is in front of me, the situation, the person, the thing, each event, as it IS. I bless what is; unconditionally.
In theory, this attention will help attend to my shadow, in the moment, as it presents itself.
My shadow side doesn’t respond well to the bright light of day, analysis or reason.
I’m practicing this unconditional self love, figuring that this too is a skill that can be learned. So, the practice. Swap fear for love. And the deal is, it’s just for a lunar week.
And, the picture is Telephoros. An important symbol for this half and half day. He’s Part of my Anam Cara picture- from ages ago. He’s speaking to me again, bringing a soft glow to all the hidden bits.
Link to my post about telephoros: https://janetbalboa.com/2014/09/11/dwarfs-illumination-and-knowing-that-everything-matters/

What I love most about teaching

15 Sep

Tools of the TradeWhen my student is beyond excited. When they have that look in their eyes. When I know that something clicked, an alignment occurred with their soul. We are together for an instant in this blissed out moment that feels like the entire universe exhaled an immense and satisfied ‘YES!’

Last week, Jim asked if he could take his picture home to work on. He was so excited to show his parents his work in progress. He’s been in class close to 16 weeks, developing his style; drawing, painting, penciling what he loves- reptiles, lizards and snakes. He is a walking encyclopedia on everything reptile. He is also a connoisseur of morning glories. His enthusiasm is contagious.

Recently, he’s adopted a new tool- Derwent Inktense Ink pencils. He uses an easel, inventing his style of working as he goes- experimenting with different papers, pencils, techniques…and last Thursday- BOOM! Lightning struck and he was hooked. The muse had him by the tail and it was just the coolest thing to witness. He grew exponentially, expanded beyond his old story of his ability and I was able to see THAT MOMENT.

‘Oh wow’ he said to himself, looking at his picture, his hands full of pencils and paintbrushes, ‘I love this. I love this.’

When class was over, as he’s walking out the door, I saw that he also had the case of the studio’s Derwent pencils. Around $150 worth of these amazing things, cradled to his chest.

So I’m like, ‘Er…you’re taking the pencils too?’ A bit hesitant to let these things walk out the door.

His face was absolutely shining, as he said so seriously – “Yes! I promise I’ll be careful with them. I promise! Is it ok if I borrow them, since no one else is using them?’

In that moment, I could see the monetary value of those pencils was absolutely nothing compared to the value that they had to him, this gifted 13-year-old artist who had just discovered an entire world of wonder and awe in a case of pencils. We had discussed the price of him buying the exact set earlier in class that day, so he knew what he was asking.

‘Yes.’ I said.

He didn’t even say thank you or goodbye, (which he does every time, because he’s a polite and gracious kid) he instead just turned and floated toward his mom, clutching the pencils and his drawing.

Is that not connection we’re all longing for? A direct pipeline to joy? This is what is sustainable. Find the things that expand you, that inspire you to become more of who you are. It’s not about ‘Am I ‘good’ at this or any other external marker. It’s about what fulfills you. And that is always an inside job. How do you find a way to let the radiance out? What is it that tickles your fancy, that you do just for the sheer delight of exploration and creativity?

‘Oh wow’ (you overhear your soul say), ‘I love this. I love this.’

And honestly, it feels exactly like the entire universe is exhaling an immense and satisfied ‘YES!’ -through you.

class ideas

26 Oct

Ahhh! Haven’t posted for AGES….

But, life has been percolating away as always, just undocumented.

I’ve been teaching an amazing variety of students, and classes. Exploring ways and methods of communicating and understanding.

For art instruction, I’ve settled on colored pencil and drawing techniques ’cause they are my absolute favorite to do therefore to some degree, to teach.

I teach  Colored Pencil I (beginners) and  Colored Pencil II (advanced) from 1 – 4 on Fridays. Since most of the students stay for both classes, my husband Rob asked if that makes all the students ‘average’. Which makes me laugh – then I wonder- if anyone of us stands up during class,  are we automatically above average? We discussed this in class last week and laughed our asses off as usual. The average age is 65 – so we share a lot of stories from vastly different paths and journeys. I love it. I love the dynamics of ‘group’ – the participation and delight that emerges. Also sad stuff, like death, sickness and other challenges that we encompass in our little accidental art family.

I’m also teaching Chakra classes, Celtic Art and this semester, trying out:

Exploring Being  
Explore meditation, consciousness and being. An open discussion class of self discovery.  Meditative coloring available.  –Inst. Janet Balboa
MON 5:30-7pm  Age 18 & up (this IS what’s on the site- but the actual time is 7-8:30)

That’s the official description right off the school’s website! How about that for just diving in and trusting! I’ll tell you how it goes. I’m so excited about it, I have so much ‘stuff’ and this is forcing me to unwrap it and get it written down in an easily explainable format. And I love the trust of my students who are signing up for God-knows-what.

Some class topics: The Moon Cycle: moon board final

I’ve had this idea in my head for ages, and posted this moon graphic on Instagram last year some time. Not a following of the Moon as such, but a resonance with a cycle- something we forget in our hard-pressed linear existence. there is comfort in repeat-ability, in a turning, a re-volving that is predictable, knowable. Using a cycle to evolve rather than being stuck in countless repetition- rather like bad habits, outworn beliefs…a cycle gives us a platform for change, which ultimately is growth. and that dark part of the moon cycle…used to be called The Shaman’s Rest…a bit of wisdom there right? Maybe resting, reflecting, re-orienting would calm our frazzled nerves and give our body a much needed chance to just BE instead of BEing driven relentlessly. I digress…

So there’s going to be a lot of meat here, and discussion. Other stuff I want to do: Burkhard Heim, how he established the placement of archetypes and the God dimension- fascinated by this. A expansive discussion. mentally challenging. and best of all, no conclusions, just creating an opening.

Meditation – not so much a new technique, but a different method for relating to the outcome- approaching meditation as an interval in eternity- accessible from the present moment.

The Feminine. Where, exactly is the Mother? Is it the Goddess returning? has she left? Are we to be content with the concept that ‘Father’ as Jesus uses it- also includes Mother? The beyond-duality concept of the creative principle? Is this a moot point? These kind of discussions.

Then there’s a weird little ‘story’ that has caught my interest and imagination that runs through the playing cards and therefore the minor arcana of the Tarot. Not using these cards for divination, but for a teaching/ reflection, which I’m guessing was the original purpose, Albigensian in origin or not. Exploring and opening this up a little- why has the protector of woman, the fight for my ladies honor, the holder of ‘woman as ideal’ rather than ‘woman as object’ (much like Mary, but highly individualized, think Dante’s Beatrice…) the Knight – gone missing from our playing cards… the when is interesting in itself.

So. That is where I find myself right now. Creating openings, holding space and excited to see who and what show up. I’ll be posting my class notes and teachings here too. So I also welcome you to the labyrinth of our meanderings.

Bon voyage!!!

Mary: work in progress

22 Feb

Work for this month

25 Apr

image

Dawning of Aquarius. Marker and colored pencil on marker paper. 11 x 14
So much color. Love it. Getting ready for a show in July.

image

Eraser Magic

7 Jan

As if by magic, but actually by eraser, her hand is gone. It was awkwardly coming up from the lower left hand corner, and was weirdly small. This is another thing I love about this technique: eraserability (no, not actually a word says my spellcheck. really? It’s perfect.) The ability to be erased. Nice.

Anyway, using the Verithin pencils is also helping- they are hard, unlike the regular prismacolors, so not as much pigment stains the paper; allowing for easier disappearing acts.  This is also marker paper which is very forgiving when it comes to erasing. I also have a very light hand and tend to deposit colors slowly, building them up gradually in intensity.

Indeed a work in process. It was (as always ) meant to be a simple practice, but it gets carried away with itself. I’m not sure if I’m going to outline everything in India ink either. Big style change? Don’t know. But a completely different technique; which means that I have no idea what it’s going to look like. I know what I would like it to look like- from a color perspective- but what I want and what I’ll end up with can be very different.

 

 

 

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janetbalboa2016

Yin Yang, Beauty and Hedgehogs

17 Dec

JanetBalboa c.2014 Marker on marker paper 12 x 12

JanetBalboa c.2014
Marker on marker paper 12 x 12

Further along. Finished a fabulous book yesterday – The Elegance of the Hedgehog by Muriel Barbery. ‘Wow’ is all I can really say about that. And, I will be sending Muriel a copy of this print as soon as I finish it and can find an address for her. Why? I sense the same quest for beauty – the same need/desire to see that beneath all the fear, all the scary stuff is a beautiful, untarnished world that reaches out to us. When we are very quiet and choose to listen, we can hear the muse. Mmmmm…yes.

I’ve also been working on a site – Go for the soul.com – where one can buy my work, if one were so inclined. I have to figure out the shipping bit, but for the most part, it is done. It drives me crazy really, because I always choose drawing over working on the site. So of course, the web site kind of plods along. meanwhile:

JanetBalboa c.2014 Marker on marker paper 12 x 12

JanetBalboa c.2014
Marker on marker paper 12 x 12

I plan to finish and scan this today. Which means I’ll post a far better picture of it, without all the weird light reflection noises. The empty spot will be filled with a shell of the type common to Ireland, (New Grange). The Discus Rotundatus, some theorize, could be a model for the famous spirals. I like the idea of a spiral shape in the ‘Yin” spot – feminine, dark , moist; perfect.

I love that frog. That was late last night. Happy.

New Work -fall leaves. Mainly.

1 Dec

work in progress

 

New work! Don’t even have a working title for it yet. Something about life-in-death and death-in-life. And how as things are ‘dying’ – returning in various stages to the earth from where they came – they are breathtakingly beautiful. The unbelievable colors of fall, the rich greens of spring and summer, and the golden brown of winter -all part of the same eternal process of life. to which, it seems, most obviously, death is an integral part. So why do we treat it otherwise? The Muslims have a beautiful saying that death in its approach is terrifying, but when it comes, that moment is actually sweet. wanting to see my life -all life- as a totality, not a sum of little disconnected parts. one great big song. With the going out as beautiful and natural and mysterious as the coming in. this picture is helping me cultivate that wider, more inclusive view. I try to come into rhythm. I am trying to honor the ebbs as well as the flows.  Each day includes at least a small letting go as well as the ushering ins of the new.  Trying to allow both the space they require, without judgment.

work in progress Nov 2014

 

 

 

Anam Cara

16 Oct Janet Balboa Anam Cara 2014

 

Janet Balboa Anam Cara 2014

Janet Balboa 2014_Anam Cara 19″x24″

Anam Cara. Prismacolor markers, pencils. a few copics too! on marker paper. 19 x 24…Finished!!!

Anam Cara – the beautiful Irish soul mate, the sacred friendship of the heart. I imagine this sacred friendship extended to include earth and sky, the intimate, glorious connection we share with all life. Filled with ‘symbology’ to help meditation and contemplation practice, this piece encourages the heart chakra to flow openly, lighting the world around you. Ygdrasil, the world-tree of Norse Mythology connects land and sky in an intimate bond of ancient kinship. The triple Goddess of Mother, Maiden and Wise Woman (a symbol for the feminine side of the Divine) Sophia encompasses all life with her wisdom, compassion and nurturing. Telephoros, with his lantern, encourages dreams and illumination of the unconscious. We are loved. Unconditionally…

What would it be like to feel this divine connection with the earth? What would life be like if we saw our life and our beautiful earth as divine gifts? What if we believed that we were entirely supported and loved unconditionally and always encouraged to evolve into constantly better versions of our self? What if we believed that the world is for us, instead of against us? What if the way we choose to look at our life and our world – as gifts – could help us live with our fear and terror? What if we accepted our self as we are, exactly as we are, light and dark? And let that be ok for now. See it as a good place to start to practice unconditional love.

It is my prayer today, that all of us who are suffering because we feel not good enough, that we are not needed, that we aren’t worthy of love – my prayer is that we come to know our self in a way that not only accepts, but delights in our differences, recognizes our fears as friends who bring lessons and gifts, and see that our incredible, one of a kind beauty  is present precisely because of our darkness. Our broken bits are what make us beautiful. They are part of the prism that scatters the pure light of love at the center of our being.  Our greatest gifts are often wrapped lovingly and snuggly in our greatest fears, waiting for us to mature enough so that we can understand what is needed to heal our wounded parts.

We struggle to manifest our gifts. We struggle to come to terms with our self. We struggle to bring our light to the world.  Slowly and with the passing of years, we begin to accept our selves. We begin to recognize, appreciate and take responsibility for our own life. We realize that we are complete. We stop the outer projection when we realize that our judging of the behaviors and actions of others is a manifestation of our unrecognized shadow. Our wounds – the dark inner places calling out to us for healing and attention. We begin to make friends with our interior darkness. This place of chaos and unformed things is also our place of potential, of creation. Our womb.  As we heal, we are ‘re-born’ , transformed into bringers of compassion, love and acceptance. We become whole and holy. We become lights for the world, living out our Divine connection to our beautiful earth and the beings on it. We can finally recognize and delight in our bond of ancient kinship. We have not been lost at all. We merely lost our way. We have always been known and loved dearly, for exactly who we are at this moment. We are the ones we’ve been waiting for…

Dwarfs, illumination and knowing that everything matters.

11 Sep

Telesphoros,  – Janet Balboa, Anam Cara detail, marker and colored pencil, 19″ x 24″ c. 2014

Telesphoros, – Janet Balboa, Anam Cara detail, marker and colored pencil, 19″ x 24″ c. 2014

 

I think of him as a healer of sorts- but maybe not a healer of symptoms, more of a caretaker of our need to create meaning where it seems none exists. A reconciler that ties things together- a witness to something greater that assures us that somehow what happens to us makes sense – that things are ultimately cared for and brought to completion. That somewhere, beyond our understanding, all is made right in the end.

Telephoros, the strange little ‘Accomplisher’ of the ancient world started out as a Celtic god. His original identity has been lost to us, but the name the Greeks gave him when he was brought to Anatolia in the 3rd century BCE give a clue: telos – meaning end, or purpose and phoros – carrying or bearing. ‘Endcarrier’. ‘Purposebearer’. His name actually means “the accomplisher” or “bringer of completion” in Greek. Telephoros was closely associated with Asclepius, the Greek god of medicine.

Carl Jung also had a fondness for Telephoros. He carved this sentence in a stone at his estate in Bolligen, Switzerland:

‘Time extending through the ages is a child playing at a game of chance. The child is king. Telephoros runs through the dark places of the world like a star sparkling in the depths, leading the way to the gates of the sun and the land of dream.’

To the modern mind, so much of what happens around us and to us seems so pointless. So accidental. So inconceivably beyond our ability to do anything about it. Our world perfectly acts out Jung’s metaphorical child playing his game of chance – great things happen. Accidents happen. Bad things happen to good people. We are overjoyed. We suffer. Despairing because chance implies randomness, suggesting non-order, no pattern, senselessness… one look around us could easily confirm this as truth. And yet…

‘Telephoros runs through the dark places of the world like a star sparkling in the depths, leading the way to the gates of the sun and the land of dream.’

To the ancient mind, most worldly or psychological forces were personified – it’s simply much easier to relate to a person or animal than to a concept of something. So our very human need for completion and purpose became Telephoros, personified as a dwarf, wearing a hood or cap and carrying a lantern. Dwarfs stand as a guardian of the threshold between the conscious and the unconscious realms. They traditionally have a life hidden from mankind, preferring twilight and night to daytime. I like to think Telephoros, when he’s not gatekeeping, carries his lantern through the depths of our personal and collective unconscious, shedding light on that which is in darkness, illuminating through dreams and longings what remains black and unknown in our waking hours. He casts a glimmer of purpose, balance and completion into the darkness of misunderstanding. He runs beyond limited concepts of time and space, acknowledging those things that appear accidental or random or unfinished. Holding his small light, he hurries ahead, urging us to the gates of the sun, the place of illumination, where life can be seen in its wholeness.
If we choose to entertain Telesphoros’ metaphor, we will find it easier if we adopt an attitude of faith that outside of time and mind heartaches will end, opposites are reconciled and healing is accomplished. The price of this faith is our willingness to allow light into our darkness.
Can we allow things the right to exist as they are, beyond our human compulsion to categorize them as good or bad, wrong or right, timely or untimely? Can we begin to conceive of a metaphorical space where opposites are reconciled and everything brought to completion- in its own time? Can we be ok with that? With not knowing? With letting something so important to us be ultimately out of our hands?
Compassion, deep self-love, acceptance, gratitude, mystery – these are concepts that we must personally personify in order to connect with the ancient belief echoed by every great teacher throughout time – that beyond our understanding, somehow, all is made right, things are cared for and everything matters.

 

Meditating on or moving with Telephoros can be particularly enlightening. (puns are good!)
In my drawing, Anam Cara, I’ve put the symbol for the feminine on his cape, indicating his integration with the intuitive feminine shadow world of dreams and the unconscious. Jung seems to have included the symbol for Venus on his Telephoros figure. ( I’m not sure if this is certain, but it makes sense.) Metaphorically balancing all energies,(i.e. healing), contemplating the concept of Telephoros provides a bridge to the idea of completion, integration, acceptance and ultimately surrender. Light a candle placed in a bowl of water. This is a great symbol of light in the unconscious realm.

Now… imagine seeing a book below the surface of a lake that is smooth as glass. Reach into the water and pull up the book. Watch the ripples as they recede and return the water to stillness. Notice the clouds float by in the reflection of the sky. Are you on the shore? In a boat? is the water cool? Is it a hot day? Do you hear birds? what do you smell? This sort of detail really gets your self involved and often allows things to drift to the surface that just as well might have remained on the bottom…. Become aware of what’s around you. Whenever you are ready, go curl up by the foot of an great oak tree and imagine reading that book!

The Castle

7 Jun

janet balboa, Anam Cara detail, marker and colored pencil, c. 20014

janet balboa, Anam Cara detail, marker and colored pencil, c. 20014

 

 

janet balboa, Anam Cara detail, marker and colored pencil, c. 20014

janet balboa, Anam Cara detail, marker and colored pencil, c. 20014

 

Ever forward, but slowly…

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